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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24477745">To Love a Seafarer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/larissita/pseuds/larissita'>larissita</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Back and into the rabbit hole [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chronicles of Narnia (Movies), Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Book/Movie: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Cannot stress this enough- the archive warnings are for like a single second, Courting Rituals, F/M, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Why Did I Write This?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:55:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,458</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24477745</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/larissita/pseuds/larissita</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Edmund and Lucy look at the painting in the Scrubb's attic. The first thing Lucy and Edmund had known of Narnia had been delicate snow falling from the skies, a cold so intense their breath became fog as if left their lips. The first thing Caspian had known of the actual Narnia was a dark forest with voices that belonged to creatures that were told to be long dead. The first thing Eustace knows of Narnia is a lungful of water and the deep burn as it comes out.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Caspian/Edmund Pevensie, Corin/Edmund Pevensie, Edmund Pevensie &amp; Lucy Pevensie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Back and into the rabbit hole [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1632655</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>120</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Lone Islands</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first thing Eustace knows of Narnia is the salt water filling his lungs as he struggles to breath. He had never known salt water could hurt so much. The only time he had gone to a beach back in England it had been too cold to go in the water, he had simply walked around as his mother sat down with a picnic and his father read the paper. He had been a child back then, it had been before the war. He had never gone back to the sea in England. So Eustace gets a lungful of water and struggles to breath, and he’s suddenly pulled out of the water. His lungs expulse the water in a vain hope of trying to avoid the pain of suffocating. In exchange he feels the deep burn of water leaving his lungs, burning on the way out as his brain became hazy with the need to breathe some air. Eustace is pretty sure he’s just been kidnapped, and really once he gets to the british consulate he will make sure his weird cousins are brought to justice to suffer from their actions. Is that a talking rodent? Before passing out, Eustace thinks, in a dark corner of his mind that it’s the first time he sees his cousins smile in such a way.</p><p> </p><p>“Is he really related to you?”</p><p>“Unfortunately.”</p><p> </p><p>By the time Eustace comes back to himself his cousins are in different clothes. And Lucy has never looked more comfortable that she did in the clothes she was now wearing. Blue pirate pants stuffed in tall and too big boots, a loose cream shirt and a leather belt tight around her waist holding it all together. She looked nothing like the girl back in his house, nothing like the girl wearing tights and a colorful dress. Here she looked like something else, like the books that talked about pirate women who passed for men back in the 17th and 18th century. Lucy was resting against the side of the ship, talking to the rodent from earlier and to the other kid who had save them. He wasn’t exactly a kid, he had a stubble and everything but he was still closer to their age than the captain of the ship who was among the only other humans. Most of the crew seemed out of old tales. Eustace had never seen her like that, she was all smiles, standing tall but relaxed. Eustace looked around, finally noticing where his other cousin was, Edmund was at the front of the ship, no longer inside the actual ship safe. No, Edmund had climbed the side of the dragon head and had attached himself secure with some rope and was now dangling over the ocean, his clear voice singing some old shanty.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Of all the money that e’er I had</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I spent it in good company</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And all the harm I’ve ever done</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Alas, it was to none but me</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>And all I’ve done for want of wit</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To memory now I can’t recall</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So fill to me the parting glass</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And drink a health whate’er befalls</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then gently rise and softly call</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Of all the comrades that e’er I had</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They’re sorry for my going away</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They’d wish me one more day to stay</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But since it fell into my lot</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That I should rise and you should not</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He was dressed in similar fashion of Lucy and the other ones, loose pants stuffed in tall boots, both shades of brown this time around. A pale blue shirt, clearly loose by how much the sleeves would puff around his arms, and a similar belt holding it together at the waist. He had the same smile as Lucy did, happy and serene. Like they were finally where they belonged.</p><p> </p><p>As long as Eustace could remember he had never seen his cousins this way. For starters, Alberta had never held a particular love for her sister, when asked about such subject she would always answer the same: “my sister is too much of a believer, while I believe in logic”. So Eustace never had much interaction with his cousins but he did remember them from before. He remembers them from before the war, he was young, had been ever younger then but he knows he remembers correctly. More than that, Eustace had always been one to spy on the adults while they talked of serious talk. He remembers a Peter that used to boss around his siblings because he was older. He remembers clear as day a Susan who never had time for her siblings and their childish games. He remembers Edmund’s venom, even as an 8 years old, he had known how to be mean. And he remembers Lucy as a insecure child, who wanted things to go her way to the point of sometimes being spoiled. He remembers his aunt’s words: “she’s the youngest, it’s normal, she’ll grow out of it, all kids do eventually”. And then, the Pevensie’s had been sent of to the countryside because of the war, and Eustace hadn’t seen them in years. When he had seen them again, they were changed, completely. His aunt and mother had discussed in the kitchen in a rainy afternoon around some tea.</p><p> </p><p>“They worry me. They came back different from the countryside.”</p><p>“They grew up, we’re at war, change is natural. Kids can’t stay kids for long nowadays.”</p><p> </p><p>“No it’s something different. As if they suddenly grew up, they don’t act like kids anymore. Peter is so protective of his siblings, not like before though, it’s like he knows them and understands them in some deep way, it’s so strange. He’s even protective of them against us, why is he protective of them against his own parents? What’s even worse, the kids won’t come to us if they need something, they’ll always go to him first. We feel like ghosts in our own home at this point. Peter will get in fights in school too, we don’t know what to do.”</p><p>“Well, they were in the countryside and they had to depend on each other. Peter is the oldest, I think that sounds quite natural. It’ll take a moment but they should go back to normal eventually.”</p><p> </p><p>“That’s not the only strange thing, Susan is an adult by all accounts. I heard her talk to some other girls in her classroom. I don’t even know how to explain it, she’s an adult. She’s rational and calm, articulated in a way no child should be, and what she reads. Alberta, no 14 years old should be able to read books that scholars have a hard time with.”</p><p>“They spend two years in the countryside with a professor, they were bound to pick up a few things. All those rainy and cold days where they most likely had to stay inside. It seems quite reasonable.”</p><p> </p><p>“Now Edmund is one that is giving me headaches. I don’t know what happened before, but the child he was is nowhere to be found. Some mornings I’ll wake up to find him brushing Susan’s hair, he braids it too. Before he could barely spend a second with his siblings. He’ll spend hours talking to Lucy in our tiny garden, right under the tree. The animosity between them seems to have completely vanished, the same with Peter. Not that his mean side has vanished, sometimes I’ll get messages from school, he’s humiliated more than one teacher and student.”</p><p>“Peter and Edmund are boys and they are growing up, they are bound to get into a few brawls. Though you should be careful that Edmund doesn’t turn into a…”</p><p> </p><p>Then Alberta had whispered something in her sister’s ear, to this day Eustace had no idea what his mother had said. But he remember his aunt’s face turn sour and worried. Not Eustace, and not any of his cousins would ever come to know that Alberta had told her sister: <em> “Though you should be careful that Edmund doesn’t turn into a fairy.” </em> Here a euphemism for something that Alberta thought was way worse. If not one of the worse things that could happen to english boys.</p><p> </p><p>“We’ve gotten messages from school regarding Lucy too. Those are usually about how she never seemed to pay any attention and class. How her writing is nearly perfect, an adult’s level really. She’ll spend her whole day looking at the window, a teacher caught her talking to a tree. Lucy told her she was talking to a Dryad. What’s worse, none of the other kids seem to want her to stop with her nonsense. Peter, Susan and Edmund even gathered some money to have someone make her this weird “Y” shaped flute, she plays it all the time.But she won’t say who taught her to play. She seems completely lost most of the time.”</p><p>“She’s a child with an active imagination, and she’s very smart, that is hardly something to be worried about.”</p><p> </p><p>After that Eustace had gone back up. His two youngest cousins had come to spend time with them, their parents gone to the United States with Susan, Peter had gone to the professor’s new place. Eustace had come to notice how odd his cousins really were. Right here, right now, he could see just how really strange they were. </p><p> </p><p>“King Edmund has a beautiful voice doesn’t he?” The young man from earlier, the one that had been talking to Lucy, had made his way closer and was now standing a little on the side, appreciating Edmund’s voice.</p><p>“King?! Have you gone insane? Edmund isn’t king of anything.” Before they could get into an argument, Edmund had made his way to Eustace and Caspian.</p><p>“It’s really no use to argue with Eustace, Caspian, he never listens. And while defending our honour is appreciated, we aren’t kings and queens back in our own world.”</p><p>“Well, he’s certainly mistaken, for we are in Narnia. And in this world, you are King Edmund the Just and your sister is Queen Lucy the Valiant. And while you are here, then your cousin should behave with respect.”</p><p>“Well, Eustace was never one for respect. And we’re not, not anymore, not really. You are the king of Narnia now, and we weren’t meant to rule side by side.”</p><p>“You guys are ridiculous, I want to talk to a british consulate!” Said an angry Eustace before shuffling away. Caspian turned to Edmund.</p><p>“What is he talking about?”</p><p> </p><p>Before the discussion could go any further, Eustace had effectively insulted Reepicheep. Most likely the tail of the mouse had been at the center of the conflict, since this one was demanding a duel against the English boy. By the time the situation was under control the sun was setting and everyone seemed ready to be done with the day, ready for dinner and a good night sleep. Lucy had been given her own cabin, the one Caspian had had until then. Right under her cab was Drinian’s. And under that one, was the one that Caspian now held. That cabin had previously held nothing, it hadn’t been needed, the quarters at the front of the ship had been big enough for the rest of the crew. Now the tiny cabin in the back held a small bed for Eustace, and two hammocks so close together that it might as well had been just one.</p><p> </p><p>The hammocks were so close in fact, that Caspian felt Edmund get up in the middle of the night. <em> We weren’t meant to rule side by side </em>. Treacherous words that kept going through his mind, in an endless repetition. Last time he had seen Edmund before today, had been three years ago, for once the time between their world and Narnia had been pretty similar, for the Pevensie’s it had been two years. In those three years, things had changed a lot for Caspian. The first year had been so busy he barely had the time to breath. And by the time he could think about being king, he had become used to the situation. By the second year he had developed the incredible capability of thinking about all kinds of things while holding a conversation, a wonderful thing really. That was also the year he had found his thoughts escaping him.</p><p> </p><p>It had started innocent enough, he had thought of his coronation, of the words spoken by his wet nurse as a child. <em> There was once two kings and two queens who reigned side by side in Narnia, a very long time ago. </em> That story always started the same way, with the descriptions of them. <em> The youngest queen had within her eyes the sea at the east, her hair like the shade of copper that used to decorate the biggest of ships. She was like a fairy, her feet light like she was made to float along the waves. Her laugh so loud, she was said to bring life whenever she went. The other queen, the second oldest, was to be said the most beautiful woman in all of the world. Her eyes the shade of the freshest of oasis and her hair as dark as a night without stars. She was so beautiful, like a perfect work of art, and the stars would hide before such a beauty. She held within her every sweet fruit, her lips as red as the purest ruby, were said to taste so wonderfully that men would die for a single kiss. She was gentle and she held every summer breeze calming down the harsh sun of the south. The eldest was the high king, within his eyes were held every single storm of the north, a shade of blue that could be just as magnificent as dangerous. His hair the shade of gold that once decorated Cair Paravel and he held on his shoulder the whole weight of the world. He was as fierce as a lion, within his voice he held a roar that could make the world tremble. The Second king, was the second youngest of them, he was different. His eyes held the whole of the western forest and his hair was the darkest of the willow’s bark. His skin as pure as the untouched snow of the mountain tops, and the summer warmth would bring forward the many kisses dryads had bestowed upon him. He held within him every wild wish and every dance during the Bacchanalia. His laugh was a wind gently passing through the branches of the forest. </em></p><p> </p><p>So Caspian had thought of the kings and queens of old and of the old tales told by his wet nurse. He remembered the kiss Susan had placed on his lips, like a blessing, like a goodbye. Caspian had thought of her beauty, she was a true work of art. But as the nights went on, he found himself comparing the siblings. And slowly, the image of Susan had faded a little, instead Caspian would find himself thinking of the night before his coronation. Of the celebration that had taken place, the music that seemed to fill Miraz’ castle like never before and never since. He remembers the fauns dancing and playing music, even as the wine overflowed. He remembers seeing as the dryads pulled on Lucy and Edmund to dance amongst them, flower crowns decorating their heads. Later they pull Caspian too. And then Caspian remembers as Bacchus had shown up. A god of old, just as Aslan would appear the next day. But Bacchus had only eyes for Edmund. Caspian had never seen such a thing. They were so beautiful together. Bacchus seemed barely older, skin of gold and hair in curls decorated with vines. Edmund was all pale skin and dark hair. They danced together the whole night, leaving him to dance with Lucy. But Caspian had been distracted more than once. In Bacchus’ arms Edmund was soft and pliable. The King didn’t miss a step, didn’t miss a beat. His whole body moved with abandon, wild and free. Caspian hadn’t taught that such beauty could be displayed. What had been even more shocking for his young mind had been what he had seen later in a hidden corner of the castle. Most of Narnians had gone to sleep here or there, but Edmund and Bacchus had disappeared in the night. Caspian had found them after a moment of searching. Two bodies pressing in a dark corner of the castle exchanging wild kisses. He had run away quickly to not disturb. After all, it was none of his business.</p><p> </p><p>The issues had come later, a year passed his coronation when he actually had the time to think. When the image of a beautiful queen had been replaced by something much more tempting. A beautiful king. A wild and free man to become. Caspian had known that last time they had been too young for such activities but Caspian could nearly see him. Taller, his hair longer, his cheekbones just a little higher. The bow of his lips just a little more defined, his jaw just a little stronger. His limbs just a little longer and his chest just a slightly larger, age would suit Edmund perfectly well. In that second year, the images had made Caspian’s blood boil within his body. The third year had been worse. The images had become fantasies. The smallest of things could trigger one. A wine that would be particularly sweet and Caspian would wonder how delicious it would be to suck it of Edmunds lips. Music would cause images of Edmund dancing like that night, and suddenly Caspian would feel too tight in his pants in front of the whole court. He would never thank the gods enough for the heavy fabrics used by most of the Telmars. It was as its worse at night. When he was alone in his room his mind would take over. His imagination would go wild thinking of dark hair sprawled over his pillow, of light skin marked with gentle bites, of lips red from wine and kisses, of slim fingers holding onto the covers, of a voice like the wind that would get louder in the night, a body that would shake in pleasure like the leafs of the trees. Caspian had taken cold baths in the hope of calming down more than a few times. It had been useless. Most of the nights, the only thing that had calmed down his ardor had been some alone adult activities (masturbation, but Caspian refused to think of it as such).</p><p> </p><p>But now Edmund had come back to Narnia. And Caspian could feel his heartbeat, a crazy hope that both Edmund and Lucy were here to stay this time around. In the middle of the night all that Caspian could think about was Edmund smiling. The time from before they had all been too worried, time had gone by too fast. Caspian hadn’t had the time to see Edmund like he had today. All soft smiles and light laughs. Last time Narnia had been at war, and while now they were on a mission to find the lost lords, Narnia was far away, and the sea was calm. They would be in the lone Islands by the next couple of days.</p><p> </p><p>Of course once they had landed on Falimath they had been attacked by pirates and Caspian, Lucy, Edmund and Eustace had been captured by the slave trader Pug. By a twist of fate, Lord Bern and Caspian had recognize each other. The conversation following had been a little uncomfortable. Lord only had enough money to buy one of them. Eustace had stayed mostly silent, clearly terrified of the whole situation.</p><p> </p><p>“This is ridiculous, you need to buy Caspian, he’s the actual king of Narnia. He has to get back to the ship.” Edmund knew that Caspian wasn’t thinking with his head and it was pissing him off.</p><p>“Ed, you and Lucy can’t just stay here. I’m not abandoning you.”</p><p>“My King, if I may.” Lord Bern’s voice was low but sure. “I know that most of the island wants to revolt against Pug and the Slave traders but the Duke won’t do anything about it. I’m sure we could prepare something but unfortunately, the market is held tomorrow.”</p><p>“Caspian, Edmund is right, you have to go with Lord Bern. If anything happens to you then Narnia will fall in chaos again. It can’t.” Lucy was firm, time was of the essence and she knew better than to argue with an Edmund that had set his mind.</p><p>“What if something happens before I can get there?!” Caspian clearly didn’t want to adresse the very possible fact that they could be sold. What’s more, Lord Bern had said that people came from all around. It means there was a huge chance that they would be sold separately and would be taken somewhere else.</p><p>“You would do your possible to come and find us right?” Edmund looked at Caspian, waiting only for a second before Caspian noded. “Good, then Lord Bern please take King Caspian with you, we’ll do our possible to not be sold tomorrow.” Edmund’s voice left no place to argue against him. While Lord Bern concluded the trade, Caspian looked at Edmund. His brows, frowning in reflexion, his mouth turned down in worry. In this situation, Edmund clearly trusted Caspian enough to know that he would come and save them. Then Caspian left.</p><p> </p><p>The day after, the slaves were being sold. Eustace had been smart enough to force himself to vomit, faking illness enough to not be sold. Lucy was next, she was actually sold, even though she had punch the slave trader right in between the legs when he had tried to push her off the stage and to her master. Her mouvements had been deliberately slow, making sure Edmund and Eustace had seen who had bought her. There were multiple reasons why someone would buy a slave. The first was as a servant outside the house, for the fields. The second was a slave of the house of course, this being most likely what Lucy has been bought as, seeing her younger age. The third reason was because a tutor was needed in a rich household. Certain nobles wanted their kids to learn disciplines that were only thought outside of their own countries. And a slave was cheaper than a tutor in the long run. But that was usually the case for older slaves, who were too old to be useful in field work. Now the fourth reason was the one that filled him with pure dread. Some slaves were sold for their sexual appeal. Lucy was too young to be sold as such, but then again there were plenty of twisted minds around. Edmund was trying to calm his thoughts as his sister disappeared in the crowd. Peter would be furious if he ever learned about this. Edmund had been so distracted that he had been pushed on the stage without even paying much attention. His eyes were scanning the crowd, trying to search for Caspian or for the crew of the Dawn Treader. He really hoped Caspian had been successful in making a revolte by tonight at the most. Suddenly he was dragged away from the small stage, apparently someone had bought him in the auction. Pug was roughly pulling on the chains around his wrists, dragging him to his buyer.</p><p> </p><p>The man was tall, skin tanned by the harsh sun, his clothes shades of deep blue and ruby red, the whole thing decorated with golden thread. Clothes belonging to Calormen. Edmund had always wonder how they could wear so many clothes in such a heat. <em> Where was Caspian </em> was the only thought in Edmund’s mind as he was dragged away from the auction. Just as he was about to leave the marketplace, two things happen. One, he felt his new “master’s” hand move over his butt, definitely copping a feel. Such action send his mind in a spiral of <em> Fuck, I was bought as a sexual slave </em>, his stomach filled with dread and his hands sweating nervously. His body shook in disgust, his brain trying to decide between flight or fight. Two, there was a ruckus coming from the auction, among the sounds were swords hitting against metal. And really, Edmund had never been so happy for such a sound. The man was trying to pull him away faster now, certainly he had guess what was going on. Edmund planted his feet firmly in the floor, trying to twist his body around to catch a glimpse of what was happening. The man was now holding his arm hard enough to leave a rather nasty bruise but Edmund could barely registre it. There, right there, that was Caspian and Edmund was so relieved. Caspian seemed to get a glimpse of him too because while the crew took care of tying up the remaining slave traders, Caspian made his way quickly to him. Edmund smiled.</p><p> </p><p>“You should let go of him. It’s a crime to buy or sell slaves under Narnian rule and in its territories.”</p><p> </p><p>Caspian’s voice was the voice was firm and powerful. The voice of a king. And Edmund found it fascinating, this voice had exchanged his telmar accent for a Narnian one. This voice had nothing of the gentle prince who had once healed him in Aslan’s How. Nothing of the shy boy who had once confess to him about fantasizing of being his friend. Caspian really had grown into his role as a king, letting the prince he was back then fade away. The Calormen’s face seemed to turn sour, as if he had just bitten on a lime. After a second of reflection, he let go of Edmund’s hand and went to talk to Caspian, walking closer, his voice low. Caspian's face turned dark.</p><p> </p><p>“Disappear before I cut your head off.” The slight Telmar accent in his voice had come back. Caspian looked really, really mad, and it was creating some new feelings in Edmund to see him like that. Edmund had seen Caspian in a lot of ways, even in their short visit before. He had seen Caspian worried, as the plans to take Miraz’ castle were made. He had seen Caspian scared as he had face the White Witch. He had seen Caspian careful as he took care of his wound. He had seen Caspian as his hands tremble, incapable of killing his uncle, because that man was family, no matter what he had done. And Caspian loved him just as much as he hated him. He had seen Caspian shaky yet proud as he placed the crown on his head. He had seen Caspian sad as they left Narnia last time around. But this furious Caspian was new and it made Edmund blush and his breath hitch. And it made Edmund bite his lower lip in the hopes of swallowing back a sound that shouldn’t ever try to come out.</p><p> </p><p>The Calormen left nearly as soon as Caspian answered what Edmund supposed had been a question. Leaving the key of Edmund’s chains in the Telmar’s hands. And as soon as the chains were off Lucy was jumping in his arms, a shy Eustace following not too far behind. And as soon as Eustace was close enough, Edmund pulled him in a short hug. Because both Pevensie’s remember what it was like to be in a whole new world, and Edmund remembers what it was like to fear for his life. Drinian and Lord Bern were talking to Caspian, getting ready to fix the situation in the Lone Islands. To make a better relationship between them and the rest of Narnia. They are invited to spend a couple of days in Narrowheaven, in Lord Bern’s house. It would also give them enough time to stock enough food and fix things about the ship before the long trip to follow to the six remaining lords. While Drinian declined with the crew, saying they would get to work quickly if they stayed in between the town and the ship, Caspian and the Pevensie’s accepted. Eustace had rather prefered to go back to the ship, deciding not to take the chance of being sold as a slave again.</p><p> </p><p>Lord Bern lived in a house with a his wife Mareesha, they had together 3 children. The eldest was a son the age of Edmund, and lovely twin girls barely a little more than a year younger. Dinner that night was a lovely thing. For Bern was one of the few Telmars who hadn’t been afraid of what the Narnian’s forests held. He had know all about the tales of old, about the magical creatures and the talking animals. He had known of the kings and queens of old and seeing in front of him Edmund and Lucy was the chance in a lifetime to have all of his questions answered. Of course, his children, had known of the stories too.</p><p> </p><p>“From the old tales, I would always imagine that you and your siblings had been older back then. It seemed as if you had been adults when you took the throne. I imagine there is a lot of what hadn’t been told in the books.”</p><p>Lucy’s laugh was enough answer to imagine just how much had been left out of the books.</p><p>“If only you knew lord Bern, the books have forgotten so much. I imagine it’s because most of the books have been destroyed by time but still.”</p><p>“Please dear Queen Lucy do tell.”</p><p> </p><p>And of course, how could Queen Lucy deny such a request. She talked the night away. From the time that Edmund had dressed as Lucy to go with Susan to Tashbaan, barely any younger that he looked now (Edmund had looked cute in a dress). To when he had been an adult and had been challenged to a duel by Rabadash (Rabadash had gotten stuck on a wall, it had been hilarious). Lucy talked about Peter’s comb that no one was allowed to use under penalty of death (he was very serious about it). She talked about the most ridiculous tasks Susan had given the men courting her in the hopes they would abandon (she had send some men as far a giant territory). She talked about how Prince Corin had come to kiss Edmund for the first time. The simple mention of this story actually turned Edmund’s cheek a soft pink, words of protest leaving his lips fast.</p><p> </p><p>“Really, Luce, this story again?” Edmund’s face settled into a soft pout as Lucy decides to ignore him and keep going with her story.</p><p>“Shush Edmund, of course I have to tell this story. Now, this was back when Edmund had just turned 18, back then he had already been courted by a diplomat from Archenland, Perrin. For a year back then, without getting a single yes. Of course Azim, who was one of Rabadash’s younger brothers had been courting Edmund for three years then, without any results either. Now we had decided to invite King Luna and his two sons, Cor and Corin to spend Christmas with us for we had organize a tournament and Corin was said to be the strongest man in all of the world. People said he could even wrestle with a bear. So they arrived and the day after, the tournament started. I don’t know how it had gotten to that but the participants had wanted a price for winning. So someone amongst them came with the idea of a single kiss by the Queen or King of their choice. We all turned to Susan since we knew she would most likely be the one chosen but she didn’t mind much and she didn’t want to spoil the fun so we agreed. To this day those fights are amongst their fiercest I have seen outside of a battlefield. The participants were really motivated.” The story was broken by Lucy’s giggles, she took a moment before calming down.</p><p>“Hold and behold, Corin ends up winning. At this point Corin has more than one cut, though he isn’t bleeding heavily, a busted lip and a bruising cheek. We declare him winner and we wait for him to walk to Susan for a kiss. But oh, the surprise. He walks, passed me, passed Susan, passed Peter and stops in front of Edmund. Now it’s silence, all of the narnians and visitors are waiting to see what will happen. The stories about Edmund’s courting were legendary. The huge gifts, horses from Azim, a solid gold chess set from Perrin, the finest of clothes and jewelry all received without so much as a kiss somewhere else than a cheek. And here comes Corin. Without even so much as a presenting gift and everyone was expecting Edmund to refuse. But we had agree and Edmund always follows through, so Edmund gets up from his chair and kisses Corin in front of everyone. At this point it should be known that both Azim and Perrin were not too far away and had watch the whole thing. Everyone is still completely frozen besides Corin who’s enjoying Edmund’s attention very much. Then suddenly all you can hear is Azim, swearing in a way I had never heard before, I mean really, it was impressive. And then a fight breaks, Corin is pulled from Edmund by Azim, Perrin gets in there too, trying to save his prince. But I'm pretty sure Perrin got a few hits in too. It’s a mess and we’re all kind of trying not to laugh. Edmund is clearly embarrassed which makes it even funnier. After the situation is back under control, Corin turns to his father, King Lune, looks super serious and just says <em> worth it </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>By then, the people around the table had exploded in laughs. Even now Edmund, was clearly embarrassed even though he chuckled a little. Caspian was looking at Edmund, trying to imagine what he would have done in Corin’s place. If him Prince Caspian of Telmar, or such thing, could have had a single kiss from King Edmund. The truth was that he would have most likely done the same. He could imagine it, Edmund’s lips pressing against his in a moment of pure delight. Caspian looked around the table as the laughing faded. He wasn’t the only one observing Edmund. Bern’s son was doing the same and jealousy reared its ugly head. Who was he to watch King Edmund in such a way.</p><p> </p><p>“Needless to say, the very next day Azim was gone, abandoning his courtship of Edmund. And Corin was presenting the most delightful carved wood chest decorated with silver and sapphires. That actually got him a date with Edmund. Perrin actually ended abandoning his courtship when Edmund accepted Corin’s marriage proposal a few years after.”</p><p>“Queen Lucy, thank you for the stories, I imagine indeed these ones are nowhere to be found in books. But for tonight we should retire if you want to wake at any reasonable hour tomorrow.”</p><p> </p><p>They all went to sleep, Edmund and Caspian sharing one room while Lucy had her own. They changed in silence before getting in bed. Caspian could see the ugly bruise that had bloomed on Edmund's arm because of the slaver. Such a sight made him furious. But the night was dark and seemed to hold some secrecy that made both of the boys feel vulnerable and more honest.</p><p>“Do you miss him? Corin?”</p><p>“Of course, I was supposed to marry him the following winter. But when we went back to our own world it was different. I was 10 again, it was too young to feel any of the things I felt for Corin so for a while I think I forgot.”</p><p>“Do you always forget?” This is the kind of questions that seemed to contain a thousand more. <em> Will you forget after this? Will you forget about our time together? Did you already forget about last time? Did you forget things about me? Will you eventually forget me? Will I fade from your mind while you never fade of mine? Will I be left alone with the memories of moments shared? </em></p><p>“Not anymore, when I go back I’m not a child anymore. It gets blurry by moments, a little harder. But it’s never out of grasp, it just takes some effort. And, the important people and moments never fade.”</p><p>"Does your arm hurt?"</p><p>"No, not really, I've had worse." There was a moment of hesitation from Edmund before he talked again. "What did he tell you, the slaver, to make you so upset?"</p><p>"He thought I was your owner." Caspian's voice was tight, he was clearly upset just thinking about it. "He wanted to buy you for a night."</p><p>"Well, nothing happened so it's fine, you got there in time." Edmund's voice was light, trying to calm down Caspian. "Go to sleep Caspian, we don't know when we'll sleep in a bed again after we leave here."</p><p><br/>
That night, they both had a hard time falling asleep. Their dreams haunted by a thousand of <em>What If </em> ’s. <em> What if Edmund had been sold earlier? What is Caspian hadn’t gotten there on time. What if Edmund had been hurt? What if the had never seen each other again? Caspian knows that Edmund would have wanted him to go after Lucy first and make sure she was safe. By then they could have never seen Edmund again. What if... </em></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. From Dragon Island to Deathwater Island</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Amongst the adventures and the danger, there are some soft moments.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>As I post this it 3:30 am, I haven't slept since 8 am yesterday. I did not review this this, litteraly just wrote. Apparently I have chose death. I hope you guys like it. The rate went up because there is some semi-explicit sex going on. It's really not much, cannot write smut to save my life.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They spend three days in the Lone Islands. The first two to make quick reparations on the Dawn Treader, the following to stock on water and food. It should be enough to travel for a couple of months. King Caspian had spend most of his time trying to help Lord Bern, who had been now pronounced Duke of the Lone Islands to instore some peace and calm after so long. They had done their possible to follow the paperwork of the slaves that had been sold to see if a rescue would be possible. It would be a lot of work for the people of the islands but Caspian knew that they would do their possible. During that time Lord Bern had made not so subtle propositions to Caspian for him to marry one of his daughters. Caspian had tried to politely refuse (he had tried to avoid to answer actually). Which had resulted in one or both of the twins to hang around more than necessary. Lucy had gone around Narrowheaven, bringing Eustace with her to help him get over the whole "being sold as a slave thing". Being so over stressed would not help the situation. Edmund had been left mostly alone, he had spend his time enjoying the quiet and peace of the island. Both Caspian and Edmund had avoided each other after the initial night in Bern’s house. There had been some tension hanging around but Caspian knew that once back on the ship, they would both feel better. They were leaving on the morning of the fourth morning, when Caspian awoke, Edmund was nowhere to be found. Caspian made his way to the balcony to see if perhaps Edmund was enjoying the morning air. Indeed Edmund was outside, with no other than Bern’s son. Since Lucy had told the story of Corin on the first night, whenever he saw Bern’s son too close to Edmund he felt a rather ugly protective (jealous) streak.</p><p> </p><p>Caspian couldn’t help himself. It was only made worse by the fact that the boy was so clearly flirting with Edmund. The boy would brush Edmund’s hand, place some hair away from his face, or put a hand on the small of Edmund’s back. That usually ended with Caspian dragging Edmund in a conversation or simply away for one thing or another. Right now the boy was talking in low tones to Edmund, too close to be innocent. Edmund was resting against a tree enjoying some fruit that only grew on the Lone Islands. The boy was nearly encasing him against the three, and he was getting closer. The boy was clearly going for a kiss. That little…</p><p> </p><p>“Good morning! Edmund, the crew must be waiting for us, we should really go now.”</p><p>Caspian’s voice had been too loud, perhaps even a little too aggressive. He couldn’t care right now, there was no way some boy they were never seeing again was getting a kiss from a king. His tone had been so sharp that the boy had back down in a jump, nearly falling in the process. Edmund had simply looked up to nod and walk back inside. They took their things, say a polite goodbye to Lord Bern and his family and board the Dawn Treader again. They leave the Lone Islands.</p><p> </p><p>For days on end they do not perceive any land. The weeks are all sunny. Lucy spends her days playing chess with Reepicheep, Edmund abstains, he says it makes him feel like he’s analysing his friends and he’s not very fond of that idea. Instead Edmund spends his time on deck enjoying the sun, by times it’s so hot that he even unbuttons his shirt a little. The show of skin has Caspian feeling too tight in his pants and usually hiding under deck. A little passed that first week, and as a result of that show of skin, the narnians started getting curious. Because of all the sun, Edmund’s skin seems to bloom with freckles, every day he goes to bed with a few more. Finally, Reepicheep is the one who has enough courage to ask Edmund.</p><p> </p><p>“King Edmund, if I may ask, why is your highness developing sudden spots across his skin? Is you Highness turning into a cheetah?”</p><p> </p><p>The had been eating lunch with most of the crew, enjoy a soft breeze. The fact that Reepicheep’s voice had been so hesitant and careful only made Edmund smile. He was used to this question, the number of times he had had to answer it back in their first stay in Narnia. Lucy was laughing while most of the other narnians were just watching Edmund silently.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, if you must know, they are called freckles and they show up sometimes when fair skin is exposed to the sun. I am not turning into a cheetah, a jaguar or any other spotted being.” </p><p> </p><p>Edmund’s answer seemed to relieve Reepicheep and the other narnians, perhaps they had been worried for him. Lucy finally managed to stop laughing, a clearly evil smile showing up in her face.</p><p> </p><p>“They are Dryads’ kisses.”</p><p>“Lucy!”</p><p>“What? You know I’m right. The dryads adored you and they would take any chance to kiss you. Everytime you would end up having a new freckle.” Said Lucy, her voice teasing and light. “Do you remember what they used to call you? Sapling King was rather popular, so was Wild King if I’m not mistaken.”</p><p>“I don’t know why you feel the need to bring back such things.” Edmund was pouting again a soft shade of pink taking over his cheeks.</p><p>“Does it mean that all of your freckles are also because of dryad’s kisses?”</p><p> </p><p>Lucy nodded to Caspian’s question. Now Caspian was rather curious. He remembers the freckles on Peter’s knuckles, barely there. Susan had some on her cheeks too. A few had shown up on Lucy’s forehead, cheeks and over the bridge of her nose. But Edmund was covered with them. His forehead, his cheeks and the bridge of his nose were the most clearly marked but it went on. The odd ones over his eyelids when he closed his eyes. There were a few on his chin, some scattered on his jaw and even one or two on the border of his lips. His face wasn’t the only place that was marked. It kept going. Because of his slightly opened shirt you could see the ones around his neck like a spiral staircase. And Caspian knew for a fact that there were some all over his shoulders, back and chest, the one on his waist and hip had been rather attractive. Caspian had seen Edmund change his clothes once two days before. Because they were eating everyone else could see the freckles decorating Edmund’s arms, he had rolled up his sleeves. The freckles were everywhere, in the dip of his elbow to his wrists, hands, palms, fingers.</p><p> </p><p>“I must say that the dryads must have indeed loved King Edmund a lot.” Reepicheep pipped in again. “May I ask if Queen Lucy would indulge us with the stories that accompany King Edmund’s nicknames?”</p><p> </p><p>“With great pleasure.” There it was, Lucy’s evil smile before changing into a innocent one. “Back before our coronation, back in the first few days we spend in Narnia Edmund was separated from the rest of us. The White Witch had captured him and hurt him. Edmund bled all over the floor of the western forest.”</p><p>“Luce, it was a few drops at best. You make it sound like I was a fountain just raining blood all over the forest…” Edmund was grateful that Lucy was omitting a few things but still, it had been after the fox accident. He regretted a lot of the decisions he had taken in his first few days in Narnia.</p><p>“Ed, shush, I’m telling the story. And that’s how the dryads used to tell it. Anyway, because Narnia is a place that is charged with such magic, blood spilled in protection is always...”</p><p>“... a sacrifice.” Caspian was frowning a little, his eyes focused on Edmund.</p><p>“Exactly. And because it was a sacrifice of blood, dryads that had been forced to sleep for hundreds of years were suddenly awake. A lot of them had even been born during the Witch’s reign so they had never even been awake in the first place. Their first memory is seeing Edmund, bleeding for them. So since they now shared blood, he was their Sapling King. They used to have the most wonderful description for him. Do you remember it Ed? It went a little like this: His eyes hold the whole of the western forest. His hair was the darkest of a willow’s bark, like the richest of soils. His skin as pure as the untouched snow on the mountain tops. The summer warmth brings the many kisses we have given him, marks blooming like flowers. He held every wild wish and every Bacchanalia dance. His laughter was a gentle wind passing through our branches.”</p><p>“That’s how my wet nurse used to describe Edmund when she would tell me a story about the Golden Age, or in a similar way…”</p><p>“Well it seems like your wet nurse might have been a dryad.”</p><p> </p><p>Caspian thinks of her, the soft pink of her skin that always seemed just a little off. Thinks of how his uncle had sent her away and ripped a tree of the courtyard the same day. He hopes she’s safe but doesn’t know what to think. Instead he focuses on Edmund. On each freckle, a kiss of dryads. On Edmund’s eyes that seemed to be a mix of browns with different tones of green scattered around like leaves. The sun made his hair shine like the richests of woods. On the visible softness of his skin like fresh fallen snow that kids haven't yet played with. He remembers the wild way he had dance with Bacchus. His laughter the last few days. Caspian quickly looks away to calm down. Getting a little too excited right now would be really embarrassing. Lucy had started speaking again.<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Now the Wild King nickname is much more interesting. Back when Edmund was 15 the first time around and was going through puberty. He had all sorts of moods.” There was a clear teasing tone in Lucy’s voice.</p><p>“Luce, no one can blame me for that. There’s is only so much High King Peter I can handle before I wanted to set the palace on fire. I was doing it for everyone’s survival.” Edmund laughed, this story seemed less intimate, like something that had been told a few times. A secret not so secret.</p><p>“When everything would get a little overwhelming for the Just King. He would pack his bags, take Philip and just leave without telling Peter or Susan. It used to drive them wild.”</p><p> </p><p>This got chuckles out of most of the crew, while Lucy and Edmund laughed holding on their stomach. Most could imagine the upset face of the High King and the Gentle’s Queen tight expression. Caspian could easily imagine it and chuckled at it.</p><p> </p><p>“Ed would go all the way to the western woods and would come back calmed. With burned marks on his hands and scratches on his arms. Peter would then spend 30 minutes or more telling him that he really shouldn’t do that. Of course he would do it all over again whenever Peter annoyed him too much. I know that once Peter tried to follow him to only be blocked by wolfs and minotaurs that refused to let him pass because, and I quote: King Edmund needs some time with his people and we were giving orders to not let the other King or Queens through. Peter was so upset when he came back to the palace, he spend hours walking around in circles and making grumpy sounds. It was hilarious. To this day, none of us actually know what Ed would do over there. Isn’t it time you told us Ed?”</p><p>“Well… I guess I could. You know the truth is a lot less exciting that you make it sound. I would mostly spend time hanging around. It was good to be outside of the palace. The dwarfs would show me how to forge metal. I would train with the minotaurs and then prepare medicine with the hags. Sometimes I would play with the wolf pups, those were the scratches.”</p><p> </p><p>The discussion kept going after that, questions and answers going around. Caspian was focused on Edmund. He understands why the people had loved him as a king. He was a king of the people just like Lucy was a Queen of the people. They loved to spend time with narnians and would leave the comfort of the palace without question. And Caspian finds himself liking Edmund a little more than he already does. Falling a little in love with this Wild King that was everything Narnia needed. It's easy to imagine Edmund how he must have grown to be more than a thousand years ago. Easy to imagine he must have dance amongst the trees, and easy to imagine just how beautiful he must have been. When he gets up, Caspian feels a little weak on his knees.</p><p> </p><p>More time goes by and they make little tournaments of swords fights to keep everyone entertained as fresh water starts running low. Caspian and Edmund fight, it ends in a tie with both of them standing so close they are seconds away from kissing. Swords right at each other's next. Their bodies seem to shake from the adrenaline. The crew claps and the moment falls apart. Caspian is sure Edmund had blushed. And Edmund is sure of the desire he had seen in Caspian’s eyes. That night sees them both awake as they stand on deck, under the stars. Talking about some thing or another, their minds busy with something else. They stand too close, turned to one another, ignoring the world around them. They both feel nervous, Edmund's hands shake a little. Caspian can hear his own heartbeat. Finally it’s Edmund that makes a move.</p><p> </p><p>"So, does King Caspian have a queen in mind? Don't look so surprised, I noticed how Lord Bern was pushing his daughters on you." Teased Edmund.</p><p>"By Aslan's name, no. There is no queen. I could not." Caspian was stumbling over his words.</p><p>"You will have to choose one eventually, it reassures the people to have a queen. To know an heir is on the making."</p><p>"You never did." There was a drop or resentment here, not towards Ed, but towards the world.</p><p>"It was different for us. We didn't have to, we already had two queens."</p><p>"What if the person I want, I cannot have?" Caspian had gotten closer, his voice soft, his face shy.</p><p>Edmund thinks a thousand things he should say. <em> Then you forget them. You marry someone else. You give Narnia a future no matter what. </em> That was his reasonable side talking. The other side of him wanted to say other things. <em> Take me back to Narnia. Lock me away so I never have to go back to England. Kiss me until you steal my breath away and all I can think about is you. </em></p><p> </p><p>“Caspian… Close your eyes.” When Caspian obeys there is a soft press of lips against his. They taste like the sweetest wine. A taste Caspian had imagined a hundred times. The kiss turns more heated as Caspian puts his hands over Edmund’s waist. And what a beautiful shape it had. Edmunds left hand finds Caspian’s nape and tangles slowly in the Telmar’s hair. And that hand feels like Edmund is holding the whole world. His other hand rests on a firm chest in the opening of a shirt. He feels a heartbeat, to make sure they're both awake. The next few days are a blur of sweet kisses and moments hidden away from the rest of the crew. Soft touches under a table or passionate kisses in the middle of the night while Eustace was asleep. In the middle of the night they lace their fingers, spend hours exploring each other's palm and fingers. They both feel like they have all of eternity for more.</p><p>After three weeks at sea, as the fresh water is dangerously low, they finally see land.</p><p>They land quickly, find fresh meat and a source of freshwater. That night they fall asleep under the stars around campfire. Eustace can’t sleep that night and decides to go and explore around the Island. Of course, that ends up being a very wrong idea when next morning Edmund and Lucy are both searching for their cousin. Panic filling them as the hours passed. Of course that level of panic was nothing compared to the level that followed as a dragon made his way to them. The dragon landen between the ship and the island, whining in pain as his front leg made contact with the salt water.</p><p> </p><p>“He’s hurt, do you think I should approche?”</p><p>“Luce, it’s a dragon, you should definitely not.”</p><p> </p><p>But of course Lucy wasn’t one to listen so she valiantly made her way to the dragon that also got closer. There was a bracelet of gold digging on his leg, painfully breaking the skin. She quickly took her cordial and let a drop fall in the wound until it was healed but the bracelet was still digging in. Seeing that the dragon wasn’t attacking the other got closer slowly. In fact Edmund got close enough to recognize the bracelet on the dragons’ leg.</p><p> </p><p>“That bracelet used to belong to Lord Octesian.” That exclamation from Caspian got the weirdest sound from the dragon.</p><p>“Are you Lord Octesian?” A negation from the dragon.</p><p>“Were you human?” A nod.</p><p>“Where you here for long?” A negation again. The dragon the looks at the ship before making a sad sound.</p><p>“Did you come here with us? On the Dawn Treader.” This got Caspian a forceful nod.</p><p>“Eustace?” An excited nod now.</p><p> </p><p>Horror seemed to dawn on everyone’s mind. Eustace was now a dragon and they had no idea how it had happened. They end up asking where Eustace had found the bracelet only to see the corpse of what had been another dragon. Most likely Lord Octesian had been cursed in some way to be a dragon and had died here while the other Lords set somewhere else. Well… two lords found, five to go?</p><p> </p><p>The next days are strange. Over those days Eustace realizes a few things. He wonders if he hadn’t always been a monster. If he had ever been as nice a person as he had faked himself to be. His parents had raised him a certain way. And someplace, it had made him bitter, snob. He hears the words of the others because for the first time he can’t talk. The others say that his character had been improved by being a dragon, he hears them. Eustace becomes incredibly helpful, he helps hunt meat so everyone on the crew can eat enough and even cooks it for them too. The other lean against him on cold nights. He feels more comfortable as a dragon. It’s not that people like him. It’s the beauty of liking other people back. To hearing Edmund singing under his breath when he was trying to concentrate. To hear Reepicheep talk about Narnia, about the other mice, about his life. To see Lucy care for everyone as they cared for her. It was realizing that he had been a dragon all along. And finally be okay with letting go of that part of him to become something better. He helps re-mast the ship and brings big trees so the ship can be repaired. The whole thing takes a week until the Dawn Treader is completely restocked. By then they are all afraid that they will have to leave Eustace here if his situation doesn’t get fixed soon. On the eight night Eustace gets a visit from a lion in his dream “let me undress you” he says to him, claws slash at the dragon’s skin. It's not painful, just warm. The lion's voice is powerful. And for the first time in a week he changes. Eustace wakes up as a boy, the golden bracelet falling in the sand. He’s so excited about being a human boy again he jumps to his cousins arms to hug them tightly. Caspian takes the golden bracelet and gets rid of it so no one can ever reach it. Then they board the ship and leave, dubbing the island as Dragon Island. After that, Eustace is pleasant, there are no more talks about British Consulate or England at all. He finally seems to settle down on the ship. Edmund thinks of his own trial with the White Witch, of the lessons learned. Lucy tells him of Aslan when Eustace tells him about how he had been changed back.</p><p> </p><p>From Dragon Island they had seen another island, they naturally head to it. The island is barely a day away but seems completely uninhabited. The only living beings are a few rabbits and goats. As they explored a little more they discovered stone huts, blackened fire pits, bones and broken weapons. It becomes clear that humans used to live here and that they had been chased by Lord Octesian in dragon shape. They take what they can before leaving again, and gift Reepicheep with a coracle that is just his size. The mice is excited telling them that he will sail it to Aslan’s country at the end of the voyage. He tells of the dryads who had told him as he was nothing but a tiny thing, when he was very young.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Where the sky and water meet, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Where the waves grow sweet, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Doubt not, Reepicheep, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> To find all you seek, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> There is the utter East. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Reepicheep talks of a dryad made out of roses. Her thorns had protected his mother's nest. He had been tiny, slower to open his eyes and see the world. Slower to open his ears and hear the world, slower to talk. The dryads had taken him out of the nest when his mother couldn't and had waited for him to see. His first sight had been a sun setting over Narnia. His second has been the dryad. What Reepicheep never tells is that the dryad was sick, even back then. She had been born when the Kings and Queens of Old had won against the White Witch. Flowers grow better on blood soaked soil she told him. But the body of the witch still bares some magic and it makes her sick. But that's fine too. No one is eternal. The day Reepicheep learns of life, he learns of death.</p><p>They sail again, and a terrible storm happens while they are on the sea. They stray from their route because they can only do so much against such a storm. Nearly everyone was on deck, trying to do their possible. But the night is so dark they can barely see. Water made the floor slippery and people had to scream in the hopes of being heard. Lucy had stayed in her cabin, Eustace had wanted to help. Edmund could barely see anything around, he realised he couldn’t see Eustace. When he finally caught a glimpse of his cousin, he seemed second again from falling to sea.</p><p> </p><p>"Eustace, be careful!” There was a rather loud thud before pain exploded in the back of Edmund’s head. The world turned black, everything fading around him.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not the pain that wakes him. What wakes him in the sensation the world is tilting on its axis. His sense start coming back to him slowly. He feels a little cold, but the covers feel very nice against his naked skin. Wait, why was he naked in aunt Alberta’s house? Oh! No thinking, his head felt like it would explode if he did. Edmund tried opening his eyes. He happily discovered that the room was mostly dark except for a few oil lamps that gave a pleasant warm glow. There was someone else in the room.</p><p> </p><p>“Luce?” His throat hurts and it made his voice sound strangled.</p><p>“Hey Ed, the pain should pass in a little while. A wood barrel went flying because of the wind, it hit the back of your head.” Lucy was gentle as she explains, before taking a cup of water to make Edmund drink. His throat felt way better, and indeed he could perceive a light taste of the cordial, the fire-flowers always tasted like sun.</p><p>“Mind telling me why I’m naked?” The question made Lucy giggle in delight.</p><p>“Caspian insisted you could get sick otherwise, he undressed you. You’re on strict orders from Caspian to rest here for tonight, I’ll be heading down soon to share Eustace’s space. Caspian will be joining you later.” Lucy’s voice was charged with words left unsaid. She clearly know something was going on between him and Caspian.</p><p>“So… how long have you know?” Asked Edmund, half hiding under the cover, feeling naked in another way.</p><p>“Before you even knew about, you guys aren’t exactly subtle. You’re constantly looking at each other, the shy smiles. That’s why I told him about Corin, I wanted to see his reaction.”</p><p>“And…”</p><p>“And, I know I approve of him. I also know Peter will be so sour about it. Susan will be fine with it too.” Edmund nodded at Lucy’s approval, he relaxed in the bed as Lucy left after doing one last check up on him.</p><p> </p><p>He had forgotten how many hundred times those same hands had checked up on him. How many battles had he fought besides Peter with Susan not too far behind with the archers? How many times had Lucy used her daggers to put a quick to people’s lives? Certainly as much as she had healed. By the time Caspian came to the room, Edmund had been lulled half asleep by the sea that seemed to calm down slightly and the cordial had done his miracle. Caspian comes in trying his best to not make a sound, but Edmund is a light sleeper. And Caspian is wet and clearly cold.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re making a mess everywhere Caspian, you should take you clothes off quickly.” Caspian made a strangled noise, clearly he had expect Edmund to be asleep by now.</p><p>“King Edmund, I thought you would be asleep by now.” He’s sheepish.</p><p>“Clearly, just Edmund, we’ve talked about it, right? A little awkward to call someone you were kissing just last night by his title.” Edmund sat up on the bed, the soft fabric pooling just under his waist. He made a rather tempting picture and he knew it by how Caspian seemed to lose all his focus, still wearing his wet clothes.</p><p>“Right. I’m just going to. Going to, euhm. Clothes. To change.” Caspian was stumbling over his words.<br/>
“Why would you need more clothes? You’re just getting in bed right?”</p><p>“But, that’s not proper. And you’re… I mean your virtue.” Caspian bright red face combined by his words made Edmund laugh, he tried to muffle the sound as much as possible.</p><p>“Caspian, I was nearly married. There’s not a lot of virtue to be saved. So could you just get naked and get here?”</p><p> </p><p>The telmarine seemed to have a hard time to swallow as Edmund opened the covers, showing some more skin. Without a doubt, Caspian had never undressed so fast in his life before getting in the bed with Edmund. There was a moment of pure silence before they both lie down. There’s tension hanging around, the sort of nervousness everyone feels their first time. Caspian makes the first move, gets on his side and pulls Edmund to him. They starts exchanging soft kisses. Hands slide all over, warming skin as they go. Then the kisses become more passionate, no longer just kissing but also biting, turning lips a deeper shade of red. Caspian decides to explore lower, mapping with his fingers first then his lips. He explores slowly, every dip and curve. Every sweet spot gets a bite or a light suck. He marks them, like he would a treasure on a map. And Edmund does feel like this is his first time, it’s new for this body. It’s new with Caspian. And it feels so delicious. His back arches, one of his hands is tangled on Caspian’s hair, pulling to more pleasurable parts with something akin to desperation. And oh! Caspian’s beard rubbing against the delicate skin of his thighs felt good enough to die. And Caspian’s mouth was doing sinful things down there, something that made him tremble and pulled sounds from his that he didn’t even know could come out. He was biting the fingers of his other hand, trying not to be heard by the whole ship. But was being loud nonetheless. A vaguely conscious part of him hopes not to crush Caspian’s head between his thighs. That would definitely spoil the moment. His whole body felt like a bow that was winded up too tight. He felt like he was about to snap. His chest felt heavy and blushed. His breath was short and his hands had let go of Caspian to hold on the covers, the pillows. Anything material, really. He just needed to hold onto something. He was getting louder and louder and his brain had stopped functioning. He couldn’t care, not right now. Caspian biting his thigh hard enough to leave a mark is what pushes him over the edge. Leaving him completely dizzy and like he might drown in pleasure.</p><p> </p><p>He feels Caspian come back up. His lips like butterflies on his skin. His fingers still mapping around, discovering new things with each touch.</p><p>“That was amazing.” That’s all Edmund says before pushing Caspian against the headboard of the bed. He sits on Caspian’s hips, decided to return the favour. They keep touching, like they might just die if they stop. The kisses are passionate. They barely muffle the sound of deep pleasure they make. Caspian’s hands are holding Edmund’s hips hard enough to leave light marks. In exchange Edmund’s blunt nails pass over Caspian’s back, leaving behind trails of fire and causing shivers. Their hips move together, pushing against each other. Edmund feels the strain on his legs but it only add to the pleasure. And Caspian between his thighs feels right where he should be. Hearing the sounds Caspian make is only a bigger turn on. His mouth moves over Caspian’s neck, sucking dark bruises in like he needs to swallow those sounds. Or make them come out louder. Neither of their brains is functioning. </p><p>“Edmund, I love you.” It’s a small thing. Words whispered in the middle of intimacy. Small words squeezed between kisses and needful sounds.</p><p>“I love you too Caspian.” And yet they sound like an irrefutable truth. Like nothing could ever change that fact.</p><p>They hold each other closer, they kiss a little deeper. They feel the need for each other just a little more. They keep moving until completion, until they’ve made a mess between them and they go limp. They would both thank some god or another if they could. Reality is, their brains are completely fried with pleasure. It takes them a moment before they are even able to move. Edmund feels like he’s floating on a cloud, so does Caspian. They hug each other, they’re sweaty and messy but they can’t care right now. Reality starts coming back. There’s still a storm outside, the boat is still moving around in the water. But really, the world could burn up in flames and the stars could come crashing down. All they can care about right now is how comfortable they feel against the other.</p><p> </p><p>Waking up next morning is a lazy thing. The storm must have stopped during the night, because for the first time in days the ship isn’t shaking terribly. There’s even lazy rays of sun coming through the small windows, lighting the room gently. Edmund turns in Caspian’s arm slowly not to wake him. Caspian is beautiful. Soft skin lightly tanned, prone to blushing contrary to most people with darker skin. He slides his fingertips around touching the skin gently as he looks around. The soft curve of his forehead and his straight dark browns. And Edmund slides his fingertips there next. His nose was a nice shape, right for his face, a pyramid with a nice isosceles triangle base. His fingers slip over the tip and over to his cheekbones, the follow better the square shape his jaw. Edmund had always found his own face too oval. He likes Caspian’s shape. His lips too, the upper lip has a softer bow shape, but the lower lip is plumpy and looks good enough to bite. And his beard. Edmund really like the manly beard and the longer hair. And the way his beard had felt last night. He could feel himself blush and he definitely felt warmer. His fingers are still going all over the place. They softly explore around. He wants to do more but knows they’ll be interrupted for a reason or another.</p><p>“I can hear you think Edmund.” Caspian sounds sleepy and perfect, and Edmund wishes he could engrave that moment. He wished he had a camera and could take a thousand photographs of Caspian.</p><p>“I was just admiring how pretty the current ruler of Narnia is.” Edmund’s voice takes on a teasing, making Caspian let out a low sleepy chuckle.</p><p>“I’m afraid he doesn’t compare much to the ruler of the golden age.”</p><p>“Are you talking about Peter? Because really? I’m questioning your taste if that’s the case.”</p><p>“Ew, no, gross.” That reaction makes Edmund laugh, he cuddles against Caspian a little more, pressing a soft kiss on his Adam’s apple that is now sporting a very impressive hickey.</p><p>“Susan then? People did always say she was the prettiest.”</p><p>“While your sisters are both very pretty, I wasn’t talking about either of them.”</p><p>“Who then?” The only answer Edmund receives is a deep kiss while he’s pressed against the mattress of the bed. Caspian’s strong hands hold his wrists against the bed. And if that’s not one of Edmund’s biggest turn ons, then he wouldn’t know how to explain how he suddenly turns red and warm. How his legs make a quick work of wrapping around Caspian’s hips, pulling him closer. And how his whole body stretches in the need for more contact. He needs him now.</p><p> </p><p>A knock interrupts.</p><p>“Your majesties, we’ve seen land, we should be there soon enough.”</p><p> </p><p>Edmund whines. He wants to die.</p><p>They have to make quick work of dressing up. And if they take a vicious pleasure at seeing the marks they lefts all over each other’s body, then neither of them says a things about it. They simply wear a higher collar and button it to hide everything. When they get on deck Lucy has a knowing smile on her face. She will clearly enjoy torturing them. They explore the Island. It looks pretty empty at first glance, the crew finds food while Caspian, Edmund and Lucy follow the water since some of it seems to go into caves underground. Finally they seemed to reach where the water pooled down in.</p><p> </p><p>“What do you think that statue is doing in the water?” Lucy got a little closer before backing up, the statue looked too alive-like to be comfortable. It was too creepy.</p><p>“It looks like… Lord Restimar?” Caspian went to reach into the water. Edmund quickly stopped his arm.</p><p>“Wait, something is wrong…” Edmund took a stick to poke at the statue, dropping it quickly and backing up. Had his eyes played some trick on him. That had been turn to… gold? He took a coral by the side the pond and dipped the tip, letting it fall by the side. Gold. The coral now looked to be made out of pure gold.</p><p>“What are you staring at?” Lucy was clearly suspicious and afraid of the pond.</p><p>“Who ever has access to this pond, could be the most powerful person in the world. Lucy, we would be so rich. No one could tell us what to do or who to live with.” They wouldn’t need to worry, never again for money, or war, never had to worry about  staying in Cambridge with their aunt and uncle. They could be freedom. They could live like in Narnia if they wanted. They would never have to worry.</p><p>“You can’t take anything out of Narnia, Edmund.” He should have notice their judgement was being clouded by the magic of the pond.</p><p>“Say who?” Edmund should have realise something was wrong when he said this.</p><p>“I do.” Caspian had never pulled rank on him, not before that. There was something wrong.</p><p>“You do? With what authority exactly? You can barely call yourself a king? You don’t compare to an actual monarch.” Edmund knew how to be cruel, but he didn’t want to be with Caspian so why was he saying that? Why had they both pulled their swords. Why were they fighting?</p><p>“Like you could ever talk? You’ve always lived in your brother’s shadow. You’re the traitor king.”</p><p>“Stop it you two! You shouldn’t be fighting! Can’t you see the pond is influencing you!” The desperation is Lucy’s voice finally seemed to wake them both from their weird transe.</p><p> </p><p>They looked at the pond, full of fear. They dubbed the place Deathwater Island before they go back to the ship. Three lords, four to go. They hope this island stays hidden forever or burns to the ground. It’s clearly cursed.</p><p>Back in the ship, they avoid each other for the rest of the day. They hurt each other and they don’t know what to say. They’re back in their their own small room since Edmund felt better. Eustace was still on deck, most likely with Reepicheep. And so Edmund was alone with Caspian.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry.” Edmund’s voice is small, tight like he’s scared he might cry. “I didn’t mean what I said, you’re not a bad king. By now Peter would have been in three wars. You’re doing great.” He really hopes it’s enough to repair this thing between them. He’s afraid they won’t be able to come back from it.</p><p>“I’m sorry too. What I said, isn’t true, it came from some ugly part of me and I didn’t mean a single word of it.” Caspian walked closer to Edmund. Close enough to be able to hold the other.</p><p>“But I am a traitor.” Edmund looked fragile and sounded broken, like it was some deep dark secret that was constantly hurting him. “Lucy always said that it was because the white witch put some spell on me. But, but a part of me always feels like it was just me. There’s just something wrong with me that I would do such a thing to my siblings. That I would sell them for sweets.” Edmund was now sobbing, choking on the words that demanded to be out. Perhaps he was seeking judgement.</p><p>“It wasn’t your fault. Not today, not then.” Caspian held him closer, trying to protect him. “You never held me responsible for the white witch’s apparition in Aslan’s How. And yet, I was older than you, I should have known better.”</p><p>“How could you have known? You were young, it was your first time seeing her.”</p><p>“Exactly. You were eight, you were a child, you didn’t even know about Narnia. I knew from the stories. If I’m not to blame then neither are you.” Caspian keeps holding Edmund until they both calm down. When everything is said and done, and the last tear has been cleaned. They kiss, gently, like sealing a promess. Eustace stays with Reepicheep that night, he saw the ending of that and he’s not interested in  seeing more. They deserve their privacy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay, so this keeps getting longer so now it's at least three chapters, though I'm going at it pretty fast so it shouldn't take too long.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Until the World's End</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The rest voyage and until the end of the world.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Do you guys remember when I posted the second fic of this series and I had a hard time writing 3K words. Yeah, that was fun.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The Dawn Treader keeps going east. For weeks on end they don’t see any land amongst the waves. After such a big storm and the last island, life takes a lazy turn, the crew can finally relax and enjoy the sun. The wind goes pleasantly in their favour, which helps them avoid the harshest of the work.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eustace would usually be found around the deck hanging around Lucy and Reepicheep, asking questions about some thing or another. Today’s subject seemed to be their first travel to Narnia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t understand? How was the wardrobe a way to Narnia?” Eustace asks and the question sparks a thousand answers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lucy tells him of Digory Kirke, who was born before the start of the last decade, of the last century (1888). She tells Eustace of how a young boy, raised in the countryside ends up in his uncle and aunt’s house in the middle of London. And how that boy comes to meet Polly Plummer. She tells him of explorations done in the afternoons in corners hidden from the outside world. She tells him about uncle Andrew, and the weird experiments he used to do. She talks about yellow and green rings that take you to the woods between worlds. She talks about a dead world, a world with a red sun hanging low like it might just fall over. She talks about terrible curses and curiosity, of even more terrible bells that were rung. She talks of a witch named Jadis, who burned her own world, only to follow the kids to a new one and keep destroying things. She talks of Aslan, of a great lion singing and bearing life in his every breath. Of a piece of metal falling on the ground and turning into a lampost to guide all those who arrive to Narnia. She speaks on a tree with golden apples, who bring everything that anyone could desire. She talks of the terrible witch stealing one for immortality, how she tries to tempt Digory. But Digory has been tempted once, he will not again, he brings the apple back to Aslan. From that golden apple sprouts a tree with silver apples, a protection against the witch for many centuries. She speaks of a single silver apple who’s taken back to London. The pieces of apple give back health to Digory’s mother, and both the core and all the rings are buried deep behind the house, a new tree grows with the most beautiful red apples. She speaks of the boy moving back to the countryside with his family, of a storm that breaks the tree apart. The wood from the tree is taken to make a beautiful wardrobe, one in which, years later, four children will hide after breaking a window. Those same four children will stumble back out a few seconds later, except they spent 15 years in Narnia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She speaks of small stories woven in the biggest one. She talk of the Magician's Nephew, of the Wardrobe, the Witch and the Lion. She talks of a Horse and his Boy. And Eustace stares at her, he listens to every word. The same way one does feel when reading a particularly good book, one that we fear closing because it meant putting an end to the story. Even if that was for only a second. Lucy talks for days on end and more and more of the crew are listening as the days go by. Lucy remembers Aravis, how she had ended up marrying Cor and becoming queen of Archenland. Aravis had been a joy to talk to, and even better to listen to. </span>
  <em>
    <span>In Carlomen,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she used to say, </span>
  <em>
    <span>story-telling (whether the stories are true or made up) is a thing you’re taught, </span>
  </em>
  <span>just as English boys and girls are taught essay-writing, Edmund had added. </span>
  <em>
    <span>The difference is that people want to hear the stories, whereas I never heard of anyone who wanted to read the essays</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Edmund had been quite fond of how she told epic poems while playing an instrument. It helped her memorise. And she had thought Edmund to do the same, back when Edmund would visit Corin, before the marriage proposal. Lucy catches a glimpse of Edmund and Caspian as she keeps telling stories. They stand close, a tender look between them. She hopes they will be okay.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So the days keep passing and as Drinian is ready to turn around to make his way back to Narnia - he would rather not end up up starving while making his way back- they see land. That night they go to bed calm, they will be in land by the next day. Eustace has been asleep for an hour when Edmund and Caspian come to the room, they had been enjoying the night on the deck. As the lay in the hammocks, they can’t quite find sleep. It’s Caspian that turns on his side to play with Ed’s hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can’t sleep either?” Edmund’s voice is soft, barely a whisper. They are close enough that they won’t be heard.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m worried, this voyage has been one strange adventure after another, I never expect this.” Poor Caspian looked exhausted. The heaviness of the crown.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucy and I are here to help you, everything will be fine.” Edmund’s answer pulls a little chuckle from Caspian.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, not all surprises were bad.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you have a top five?” Edmund asked before kissing him lightly, getting just a little closer from Caspian.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I believe so. Number five, finding you and your sister in the middle of the ocean. It was a very pleasant surprise, I've wanted to blow the horn for the last three years. Number four, the very first kiss we shared, I've wanted that for the last two years. Number three, when we slept in the bed and all the activities we did in it. Number two,  the morning right after. Number one,when you said you loved me back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The morning after? Why?” This made Edmund curious. After all, they had done plenty of other things. There had been plenty of other moments. The crew was usually busy but the wind had be favorable so the work had been more relaxed. Lucy had been very helpful without realising it or perhaps she knew. While everyone was busy listening to Lucy’s stories, it was a lot easier to sneak around. At some point they had even found a small space to hide behind some barrels in the kitchens. The space was so small they had been pressed against each other but they didn’t mind much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course, that is the sight I hope to wake up to for the rest of my life. So it’s only natural that it should be part of it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Caspian. You know, we’re not sure we’ll get to stay after this. Or even if we’ll ever come back.”As he’s saying that Edmund can feel his own heart breaking a little. Did Caspian really not know? There was no future for them. They were never meant to be part of the future, all they ever had is the now. He can hear his own voice turn shaky as he keeps going. “And, you have duties, Narnia needs a future, you need a queen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know, but, I hate it.” He takes Ed’s hand and kiss it gently. “I love you more than the world can contain. I’ll love you until the stars fall down from the sky. I wish you could stay, in any other case I would rather leave with you. I would rather be with you than be king. I would set the world afire if I could spend one more moment with you. There is no one else, never will be, because no one else can ever be you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can’t say that Caspian. You’re king, that’s what you are. That's what you were born to be. And you’ll be a good one, even if I’m not there to see it.” Edmund is trying to comfort him just as much as himself. He takes a teasing tone, his hand resting softly on Caspian’s cheek. “And stars are so beautiful, you would forget all about me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Never.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Words feel too heavy after that so they keep quiet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next day they make their way to the island. Everything seems calm, the find food and water and make repairs on the ship. Caspian prays Aslan for one calm island to land in. He doesn't get his way, he wakes in the morning to find Lucy gone and voices coming from nowhere.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lucy's adventures are a little different. She finds herself being captured during the night by invisible beings demanding that she goes to the invisible manor of the tyrant who is a magician. For that magician had made them invisible and his house could be found a book that had the spell ment to make them visible again. But Lucy is nothing if not valiant, and she has never before refused to help beings. She will not start now, so she arms herself with courage and her dagger and she goes in. She walks around the mansion, perhaps what scared her the most is how very empty it is. She walks and walks around until she finds a library. It’s the last door to the left of a rather long corridor. Certainly, a book of spells should be here somewhere. She ends up finding a book that looks like it’s magic in a podium in the back of the library. She opens the book, such a pretty thing, not printed, but writing, like books you could no longer find in England. Originals were too valuable and were held into private collections or archives. But there was a proper beauty to a book written by hand. There were things that couldn’t perceived, like what was a dominant hand of the writer. The sheets folded in a slightly different way on the right side where the author had pressed his right arm. The curvature of the “g” and the softness of the “a”. The lack of errors meant that the author had written page by page before binding it all together in leather. So she opens the books and starts reading through, carefully searching the spell she needs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“With these words your tongue must sew, for all around there to be snow.” She looked around herself amazed, for the most delicate snowflakes had started to fall around the library. They left no trace around, melting before they even touched the floor. But Lucy could feel them touch her skin, just cold enough to exist. She focus back on the book, searching through slowly, going at it again. Something attracts her look, a beauty incantation. She stares for a long moment to the page, imagines Susan’s face in her mind. Susan, who had always been the beautiful sister, while Lucy had been a footnote in the history books. All the suitors had gone to Susan first, only after being reject a few dared approached her. If she could just be pretty like Susan...</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Transform my reflection. Cast into Perfection. Lashes, lips and complexion. Make me she, whom I’d agree holds more beauty over me.” She feels a surge of a strange power around her, something grabbing at her insides. The page melts away to show a mirror, and there, looking at the pages isn’t her face but Susan’s. Her hand reaches to touch her own cheek, the image does the same. She watches, in a trance, so beautiful. A loud roar, one strong enough to make the earth sake. The loud roar makes her shake to her very core, she looks away from the book, the mirror image fades. Even as she shakes, she rips the page from the book, folds it and hides it under her vest. Her breath is still shaky as she finally finds the incantation she needs to make things visible again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like the P in psychology, the H in psychiatry, invisible ink and the truth in theology. The spell is complete. Now all is visible.” As said those words, she suddenly saw an old man appear, he seemed dazed and confused.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Back on the beach, Caspian had just woken up to find Lucy completely gone and nowhere to be found. He ran as quietly as possible to Edmund in case the thing that had kidnapped Lucy were watching them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ed, wake up. Wake up, love.” He shook Edmund a little. A part of his brain took a moment to notice how cute Ed looked in the morning, all grumpy too. This was certainly not a nice way to be woken but they did have to get ready to find Lucy and fight whatever was lurking around. With reason, a few minutes after they are attacked by some invisible thing. And they are quite worried until the suddenly appear. They’re a dwarf-like creatures with a single leg. Really nowhere as scary as they were when they weren’t visible. Furthermore, as soon as Lucy appeared with an old men they went scattering around. Why can’t they ever catch a break when they are on an Island?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This gentleman is Coriakin, this is his island. He generously invited us to eat at his table tonight before we’re on our way.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lucy seemed to trust him, and they trusted her. It was a plus that an actual meal was waiting for them, the mostly eat dried things while on the ocean or some fruits quickly after leaving the island since it spoiled rather fast. Coriakin leaves after asking Lucy for some help. She helped convince the monopodes that they hadn’t been uglified, before they seem fine with their new apparence. Coriakin had had to change it for their own safety, just like he had made everything invisible.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So that afternoon they make their way to Coriakin’s mansion and learn a few things along the way. Like how Coriakin was once a star, now a wizard who’s job is to take care of the monopodes on this island. Everyone eats with great pleasure, yet Coriakin only drinks wine and eats bread. Caspian wonders if it’s a sort of punishment, as his care of this island is also a punishment. Or, if perhaps, stars do not quite posses the taste buds humans do,like the talking creatures. It seems a little strange since Coriakin even knows how to make appear sweets, which Eustace takes with great pleasure. Edmund stays far away from them. Before they leave Coriakin gives them a gift, a map, and a star to follow to find the next three lords. The next day after restocking, the Dawn Treader continues on its voyage. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They sail for almost two weeks before seeing land again, they stray from the star to go towards it. The most noticeable moment of those weeks of travel is the incredibly awkward conversation that happens between Edmund and Eustace, an afternoon where it rains and they are both send to their room. Caspian clearly refuses to have a repeat of the other time. They get no say in the matter. So Eustace takes his spot in the small bed as Edmund lies down on his hammock. It’s strange how little they actually have to say to each other when they’re not fighting over something. They knew very little of each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So… How does it work?” Eustace is the one asking, Edmund is lost. How could he not be with such a question. What was Eustace even talking about? Just, what?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How what works? The universe? Ships? Humans? I mean, I can answer one of those, half the other ones.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span> “No, I mean, you and Caspian, how does it work?” Edmund feels his stomach fill with dread. Oh by Aslan...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What about Caspian and I?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not stupid Edmund, I can hear just fine even when I’m faking sleep. And you’re not exactly subtle.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why are you even asking about it?” Edmund lets out a long whine, what does this happen to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, for starters, I didn’t know it was possible. Second, is it a normal thing here? And third, do other people know?” Eustace had sat up and turned to Edmund, somewhere between curious and confused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh by Aslan.” Edmund rubbed his face. “Okay, this might as well happen apparently. So, yes it can happen that men like men instead of women or that women like women. It’s also possible to like both.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So… which one are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I like guys, just guys. It doesn’t mean I like every guy, just like you wouldn’t like every girl.” This got him a nod to Eustace that seemed to think about the subject.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, then how about Caspian?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He likes both.” Edmund thinks for a second, he had seen Cas’ reaction at Susan’s kiss. “Yes, he definitely likes both.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” Eustace nods again. “Is it normal in this world?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, it’s normal in this world. It’s taboo back in England. What you need to understand is that we grew up here the first time around. Those taboos mean nothing to us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It seems unfair. That people can’t love each other the same way most do, simply because some people use excuses to say it’s wrong.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, it is unfair, and very dumb if you ask me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, do other people know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucy knows about it, and she knows about Caspian and I. Peter and Susan know I prefer guys but they don’t know about the thing between Caspian and I. Any more questions?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you happy? Whenever you’re looking at each other you seem really absorb with each other. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my parents look at each other that way. I don’t think they actually even like each other, they mostly just avoid each other.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I’m happy, I wish it didn’t have an end. And people show affection differently. You can never really know what’s going on between two people.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eustace nods again, thinking about the whole question. A child who didn’t quite understand the world, a child faced to taboos that were given by the world with no real explanation. For there was none.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s good that you’re happy. And with a king, so that would be a good marriage too.” Edmund laughs at that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m a king too. Can’t do much higher than that.” This was really a weird conversation. “People should always do their possible to do things that make them happy. Doing otherwise just ends up in heartache for everyone. If there’s anything you need to talk about, I’m here, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I like girls.” Edmund’s laugh filled the room. It’s what Caspian comes in to see and hear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did I miss something?” Caspian changes quickly, taking the wet clothes off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My dear cousin just told me he likes girls.” Edmund had a hard time not breaking down in giggles again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, good for you Eustace.” Caspian was puzzled by the whole thing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It wasn’t like that, Edmund makes it sound like I just randomly came out with that…” Edmund’s laugh came back with a vengeance, he was laughing so hard he had a hard time breathing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now. All I. I can imagine is Eustace. Eustace coming back to his parents. Or. Or to Pete and Suze. And being like: I LIKE GIRLS! To their face and. And.” Edmund kept laughing, his words cut off by the giggles. Caspian and Eustace also join in the laughs. And yes, it was a rather funny thing to imagine, Eustace yelling at people’s face, I like girls.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So after nearly two weeks, the Dawn Treader makes it to a very dark Island.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lucy isn’t herself, she’s turned into Susan. She watches her hands. Looks in the mirror and sees Susan’s face. Touches it lightly, so beautiful. There’s a door, music coming from behind it. She walks towards it and pushes it open. It’s a beautiful garden, soldiers are celebrating all around, the war is over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dear sister.” Peter comes and grabs unto her arm. Edmund does the same on her other one and they take her to a photograph. A picture for our parents, they say, with all their children.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Where am I? I mean what about Lucy?” She feels dread fill her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucy? Who’s Lucy?” She tries, to push her brothers away. Their eyes are frozen, their smiles are fixed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But what about Narnia?” She looks around, Lucy has to be around here somewhere.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s Narnia?” They ask. She looks at them again. She finally understands what’s so wrong with them. Peter isn’t a king, he doesn’t stand tall like he should. Edmund is ice cold, where was her just king?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Lucy wakes up she nearly falls off the bed. She’s drenched in sweat, she can barely breath, she feels herself cry, her body shaking in pure desperation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aslan?” And it was him, a great lion standing in the mirror besides her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What have you done child?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know, that was awful.” She wanted to cry, it had been the stuff of nightmares.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you chose it Lucy.” And the guilt was crushing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean to chose all of that. I just wanted to be beautiful like Susan. That’s all.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You wished yourself away and with it, much more. Your brothers and sister wouldn’t know Narnia without you, Lucy. You discovered it first, remember?” She nods, without her the White Witch in still queen of Narnia. Without her, her siblings wouldn’t be the people who they had grown to be, the people she respected and loved with all her heart, as she loved Narnia.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so sorry.” It’s all she can say but they both know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You doubt your value, don’t drawn from who you are. Courage, dear heart.” And the great lion, leaves, disappearing without leaving a trace. No one could tell he had even been there.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Edmund feels the cold before anything else. He feels it fill his being, seep into his bones and burn his skin off. When he opens his eyes everything looks blurry. He can feel the chains around his wrists and ankles, digging into his skin. He can feel the ice against his side. Suddenly he’s back to being 10 years old, feeling the starvation left in by the war and a non existent childhood. He’s back to being small and frail and unimportant. His mouth is sticky and sweet, he has a hard time breathing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Edmund, dear, just tell me where they are. Then you can be king, by my side. Just give in, you know you want to, I can see it in your heart.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And her voice is as terrible as he has always, the same voice who haunted most of his nightmares. It’s always similar, he feels the hit on his face and bust his lip, and he feels the blood drip down slowly. He always feels the pain, he feels a knife cutting at his skin. </span>
  <em>
    <span>So you know your blood will always belong to me.</span>
  </em>
  <span> That’s usually what she says. But Edmund always endure it, he doesn’t fight back. Because he knows he deserves it. Because guilt is the worst demon to bear, strangling you from inside your own body. Because he’s the traitor and will never not be. There was a sudden roar and the ice seemed to melt away, a warm summer breeze.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aslan.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wonder, son of Adam, it you will ever stop feeling guilty.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve never not felt like I deserved it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No amount of guilt can change the past and no amount of worrying can change the future.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly he was awake, holding unto the hammock to stop himself from falling. Everything seemed to fall into focus too quickly, making his head dizzy. He looked by the tiny window, it was too dark outside.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Cas, wake up, there’s something wrong. We have to go.” He shakes Caspian awake who seemed to have been in a nightmare. They go outside. The world seemed to have been plunged into complete darkness. Drinian couldn’t see where to stir, they were lost. Even the silence around them seemed completely oppressive. It was apparent that a few people of the crew had had similar nightmares. They needed to find a way out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mercy! Mercy! Even if you are only one more dream, have mercy. Take me on board. Take me, even if you strike me dead. But in the name of all mercies do not fade away and leave me in this horrible land.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His torch! Edmund took it quickly to look around. The darkness was too thick, it couldn’t see more than a few meters away but they could see an old men. Hes was clearly begging to be picked up, and he was as soon as they got closer to him. There was a general feeling of oppression hanging around the air here. As soon as the old men was on board, he presented himself as Lord Rhoop. He seemed half insane, which seemed reasonable since he had spend the last seven years in this island. They make it out of the Dark Island because of a golden bird made of light. It seems to split the darkness away. Lucy smiles and says Aslan is guiding them. With Lord Rhoop now on board, there are only three more Lord’s to find, they follow the star again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They sail for a couple more days, the wind never days but it grows softer and sweeter. Both of the Pevensie’s think that they’re finally arriving to the world’s end. The Island of the Star is beautiful, there seems to be an abundance of everything. The fruit are huge and hang low on the branches of the trees, letting out a sugary smell. The flowers are perfectly bloomed, and after all this voyage this island feels like a perfect dream. They land and explore, slowly going up the side of the jungle until they stumble upon a long stone table. Sitting there are the three Lords: Lord Mavramorn, Lord Revilian and Lord Argoz. Not too far from the table are two people? No, that can’t be right.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I see you have finally arrive on my Island king Caspian, King Edmund and Queen Lucy. I am the star Ramandu and this is my daughter Lilliandil.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ramandu looked like a man in his 50’s, his hair mostly gray, dressed in soft lilac colors. He was the perfect image of a typical old sage. Edmund knows, as a star, he must a couple of hundred of years old, so he looked very in shape for his age. At least by human standards. Now, Lilliandil was breathtaking beautiful. And Edmund could see it all over Caspian’s face. How Caspian was completely focused on the girls dressed in white and that seemed to shy like a star in a particularly dark sky. Her face is lovely and her smile is perfect. She has the blondest hair, nearly silver. The most beautiful and clear blue eyes. Her beauty is so outer-worldly, Susan could never hold a candle to it. </span>
  <em>
    <span>And stars are so beautiful, you would forget all about me</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Even less Edmund. Edmund could feel something tightening around his heart in a vice-like grip. He could feel the pitying looks of Lucy and Eustace on his back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are most beautiful.” Caspian speaks as if it’s all he can say, and that breaks his heart a little more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If it’s a distraction for you, I can change forms.” And she looks so kind and innocent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” Caspian sounds like he couldn’t possibly let her change shape. Like he needed her to stay.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” Edmund’s voice is calmer, Caspian looks at him for barely a second before turning away and back to the star.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Edmund takes a breath it. He squares his shoulders. He can do it, after all they will be leaving after this voyage and Caspian will need a queen. It didn’t matter if that simple idea tasted bitter on his tongue and made him want to puke. No matter if he hated her for simply existing. He knew it wasn’t her fault but it didn’t matter. So Edmund, fakes courage and calm even when he feels like crying. Because Narnia needs a narnian queen. And a star will make a beautiful queen. Someone who will bring a narnian king to continue to keep peace. And, to keep that, it was Edmund’s duty as king of Narnia and he needed to ensure it. No matter how much it hurt him and broke his heart into tiny pieces. No matter how much Caspian’s ignorance of him feels like a stab. Because he didn’t matter, this was his last sacrifice as king of Narnia. That, he could do.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Could you please tell us what happened to the three lords?” Lucy ends up asking, not wanting to see the shy looks exchanged between Caspian and Lilliandil, clearly flirting. She knew how much it was breaking Edmund’s heart even if he put in a strong face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When they arrived here after a long voyage, they were hungry and decided to eat.” Ramandu responds. “The sat at Aslan’s table to feast but they started to fight. One cannot do such a thing. Because of that, because of old magic, the spell simply put them to sleep.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Tell us, is there a way to awake them?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you are ready for such a thing, yes. You must go to Aslan’s country, at the extreme east, at the end of this world. There, one of your company must be left, forever. Someone of this world.” He said the last part to make it clear, that neither Edmund, Lucy or Eustace would apply. “But for now, bring your crew and feast, rest, enjoy after such a long voyage. Bring the lord you have with you, let him get better here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So they do just that. They relax and they feast at Aslan’s table in calm and peace. And if they notice how absorbed Caspian looks with the star, if they notice how Edmund seems to have turned cold, how Lucy and Eustace seem a little sad. Well, no one will say a word. They decide around the table that Reepicheep will go with the Pevensie’s and Eustace to the end of the world. And Reepicheep is even profoundly excited at the idea. He talks about his dryad and what she used to tell him when he was nothing but a tiny little thing. They relax and they feast and they tell stories. In the early hours of dawn they make their way back through the ship, they are bearing enough food to last for a couple of months even if the world’s end isn’t far. Lord Rhoop stays back on the island, to get better and healthy again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the early hours of the day they get back to the ship. When Edmund makes his way back to the cabin is too find Eustace passed out on top of the tiny bed. He takes a moment to look, feeling calmer that he did since they met Ramandu and the star. Eustace looked so innocent, he was so young, barely 12 years old. Edmund really hoped that Eustace wouldn’t face the harsh realities of life just yet. Ed passes a cover over him, tucking him in, the movement foreign to his own hands. But after everything that had happened, he had a tenderness for his cousin, a care that hadn’t been there before for obvious reasons. This is what Caspian finds, Eustace fast asleep and Edmund watching over him like a big brother.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Edmund?” Ed puts a finger on his own lips, showing Caspian clearly to stay quiet. But Edmund doesn’t look back at Caspian, he can’t right now. The wound feels too fresh right now. And night always made him feel a little too vulnerable. So Edmund doesn’t look at Caspian, watching over Eustace. And Caspian finally goes to his hammock to sleep. When Edmund finally makes his way to his own sleeping place, Caspian tries to take his hand. Only to feel Edmund’s hand slip away before he’s faced with Edmund’s back. The separation and the distance between them clear. And if they both wake up with their eyes a little red, well, no one says anything either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>You know how your parents always told you as a kid, after a very bad day, how things would look better in the morning? It’s a lie. At least it is most of the times. Like it was the case right now with both Edmund and Caspian. As they took back to the sea, there was a separation that could be seen by pretty much everyone in the crew. Where before the two kings could be find close by, most likely even looking at each other. Now Edmund spend his days on the deck, close to the front, looking at the sea. In the moments he was feeling even in a sadder mood he would look to the west. Caspian could be found with Drianian all day, except at night of course. There is a distance between them and Caspian doesn’t know how to make it better. And Edmund doesn’t want to make it better because it will only hurt more in the end. The Dawn TReader has slow down, the wind is a lot gentler now, they know the end is very close.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finally, the wind stopped completely, the sea people could be seen under the sea that now the stray bloom of lilies floating around. The further Edmund looked, the more the water was covered in water. Seeing the sea people, and thinking the King had challenged him, Reepicheep had jumped into the water only to discover the water was sweet. In fact, it was so light and sweet, it was like drinking light. For Eustace the water felt like the fire had felt in his mouth when he was a dragon, it felt like flying. For Lucy the water felt like the spring in Narnia, it felt like the ride on Aslan’s back after seeing come back from the dead. For Edmund it tasted like a sweet kiss from Caspian, felt like riding a horse to battle. So the time comes to go and they start getting a boat ready to sail away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will come with you.” No one had expected Caspian to say such a thing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, you won’t.” Edmund’s voice sounded final and cold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your majesty, you can’t go. You have to go back to Narnia. It’s where you belong.” Reepicheep was trying to be nice, but he was clearly worried.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But nothing. You will stay on this ship and make your way back to Narnia where you are king.” Edmund was in no mood to deal with a king that wanted adventure instead of the throne. “You’ve made vows to Narnia and you will respect them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not like you could make me.” Caspian’s tone was that of a child about to have a fit and it was what broke Edmund’s last straw. Caspian clearly needed a reminder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who do you think you are king-child to pretend to break a promise made to Narnia and to Aslan?” Edmund seemed to stare down Caspian, if anyone had forgotten what and who Edmund and Lucy were, this was a clear reminder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We put the crown on your head on your head and we can take it away. You belong to Narnia, you stopped being your own person when you took those vows. And you will respect them Caspian X.” Lucy was now standing besides Edmund, a dagger in her hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The last of your blood belongs to it’s battlefield. Your love belongs to the future king or queen. Your everything, belongs to your people. You are not a child that can have his way because he says so. You are a king of Narnia, who made vows to me, and no one breaks a vow to the Just King without losing his head.” By now Caspian was looking down, his hands slightly shaky. Edmund seemed to loom over everyone even though he was still small, he stared everyone down. Most of them couldn’t even breath. Most of them know of the old stories. Edmund the Just King, judge and jury. Lucy the Valiant Queen, executioner. Suddenly Lucy’s dagger was planted in the wood, a few centimeters away from his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If I ever learn you tried to break your vow again, may Aslan have pity of you. Because I won’t, I will find my way back to Narnia. And I will deal with it myself. You come of the Lord Adam et the Lady Eve, and that is both honour enough to erect the head of the poorest beggar, and shame enough to bow the shoulders of the greatest emperor on earth. Be content.” Edmund stared for a moment longer, seeing if someone would dare defend Caspian. “Drinian, a word please.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Edmund made his way to Drinian and a little further away, people finally seemed able to breath. Lucy got closer to Caspian gently, she gripped her dagger and pulled it out from the wood and back to where it belonged on her waist.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you okay Caspian?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What was that Lucy?” Poor Caspian was still shaking a little. He had really felt as if he might have died.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Edmund is rather scary that way isn’t it? I’ve gotten used to is with the years. You should be happy he cares for you, this would have ended differently. Back then, Edmund had to deal with the traitors.” Caspian seemed too shaky. “We won’t leave until tomorrow, go rest a little.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Caspian made his way downstairs, Edmund was talking to Drinian.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“When you make your way back, please find a way to stay at Ramandu’s island. For three weeks to a month, enough so Caspian asks her to come back with you. Use the reparations that should be done on the ship as an excuse.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your highness, if I may ask, why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because Caspian has apparently decided to act like a child. He will need a queen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But he has feelings for…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. But those feelings don’t matter. Being a king is hard, it selfless if done right, it’s the weight of guilt and lives lost on one’s shoulders. It’s heartbreaking and lonely. But I love Narnia, and even though I am not the current king, I will never stopped being one of its kings. And I will never stop trying to do what’s best for her. It’s my last visit, it’s Lucy’s last one too. I want to make sure everything will be fine before I go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A most admirable feeling. I will ensure we stay as much as possible.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Edmund nodded in thanks to Drinian before going to his cabin, knowing Caspian would be there. He had seen him head down. He knocks on the door gently before coming in, even if he has no answer. Edmund looks at Caspian, he’s lying down on the bed and Ed comes and sit besides him. Edmund isn’t sure of what he should say.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just saw Aslan. You were right. I can’t go.” He sounds so empty, so small.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I’m so sorry Caspian.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wanted to go with you. I thought that, maybe if he saw he would let you stay. I love you”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hearing those words breaks Edmund’s heart, he lies down on the small bed. “We can’t and you’ll be fine. The star is beautiful and she will make a fine queen and wife. A good mother too.” He passes his arms around Caspian and holds him softly. He presses soft kisses to Caspian’s brow. He lets the silence be before he starts talking in a low voice, a precious moment between them only.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as the starfish loves a coral reef and as kudzu loves trees, even if the oceans turn to sawdust and the trees fall in the forest without anyone around to hear them. I will love you as the manatee loves the head of lettuce and as the dark spot loves the leopard, as the leech loves the ankle of a wanderer and as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you as the doctor loves his sickest patient and a lake loves its thirstiest swimmer. I will love you as the beard loves the chin, and the crumbs love the beard, and the damp napkin loves the crumbs, and the precious document loves the dampness of the napkin, and the squinting eye of the reader loves the smudged document, and the tears of sadness love the squinting eye as it misreads what is written.” He holds Caspian closer, passes his hands through hair and down to cheeks and back. He feels like they are both seconds away from crying.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will love you as a drawer loves a secret compartment, and as a secret compartment loves a secret, and as a secret loves to make a person gasp. I will love you until all such compartments are discovered and opened, and all the secrets have gone gasping into the world. I will love you until all the codes and hearts have been broken and until every anagram and egg had been unscrambled. I will love you until every fire is extinguished and rebuilt from the handsomest and most susceptible of woods. I will love you as we grow older, which had just happened, and has happened again, and happened several days ago, continuously, and then several years before that, and will continue to happen as the spinning hands of every clock and the flipping pages of every calendar mark the passage of time, except for the clocks that people have forgotten to wind and the calendars that people have forgotten to place in a highly visible area.” Edmund gets closer again, admires Caspian’s face, his fingertips slowly passing over the laughing lines that he already has, the crown’s feet that will only show more with time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will love you as we find ourselves farther and farther from one another, where once we were so close that we could slip the curved straw, and the long, slender spoon, between our lips and fingers respectively. I will love you until the chances of us running into one another slip from slim to zero, and until your face is fogged by distant memory. I will love you no matter where you go and who you see. I will love you if you don't marry me. I will love you if you marry someone else - and have one or two or three children - and i will love you if you never marry at all, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all. That is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way.” By now they are both crying and Edmund has reached the end of his declaration of love.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They spend the rest of the night holding each other and exchanging kisses. Telling themselves that just one more is fine. If only they could, they would add those one more to add to a lifetime. In the morning they let go of each other, they wipe the tears and leave the safety of their cabin. Eustace, Lucy and Reepicheep are waiting and the goodbyes start. Edmund and Caspian hugh tightly, Ed puts a small kiss on Caspian’s cheek before whispering in his ear. “She will make a fine queen your star, be happy.” There are a hundred words that are left unsaid because they just can’t bear to say them. It would hurt too much. If Caspian lock himself in his cabin for days after that to cry it out, well, no one says a word.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They leave on the boat. Eustace and Edmund rowing until the water is completely covered in lilies and not deep enough to keep going by boat. Reepicheep takes his coracle and keeps going. The kids swim for a little before they’re on the shore of Aslan’s country. Reepicheep says goodbye before he enter Aslan’s country.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s our last time isn’t it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, dear child. It is you and your brother’s last time in Narnia.” Lucy hugs the Lion.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will miss you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am everywhere dear child, I just don’t possess the same name. You know me in Narnia so you can find me better in your own world.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Edmund looks to where the Dawn Treader should be before they step through the water and into their own world. Suddenly they’re are back in Cambridge. Lucy with her skirt and white stockings. Edmund with his shirt and pants, sitting on the bed, watching the picture again. And Eustace notices the incredible sadness of his cousins, and feels the same.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So this is it for this part, if you check out the series part you must have seen that I have 3 more planned before I'm done with this. Kudos and comments are always appreciated. Thank you for reading.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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